Sorry for the delay, I have so much more to tell, but have spent the last week in bed or the can, suffering terribly from the lingering effects of being in China a bit too long. I still owe you information on:
- My "Green IT" keynote in Beijing, which was very well attended and clearly a very popular subject, followed by me rushing to a plane in my dark suit, red tie lugging my 100lb bag. Upon arrival I watched a commercial for something that was clearly about being "green", environmentally conscious, etc. I thought, "hmm, these folks are really living this post Olympics – good for them – only to find that landing in Yi Chang all I could see was smog, and when I made it to the boat on the Yangtze to spend 3 days with a bunch of global PhD's yapping about trusted computing, I happened to look down, and the river may be the most disgustingly polluted bodies of water ever. On a positive note, the water was green – literally.
- I was in the front of the bus on my flight to Yi Chang for some reason, and was all alone, so the three stewardesses' were outrageously attentive, to the point of annoying. I gave in an ordered a beer and declined what I think was an offer for a foot rub. The beer never had more than a sip out of it and was immediately filled. There are worse things. In order to attempt to avoid conversation, I had the laptop opened and blared tunes via my iPod. I was listening to an eclectic mix of Pete Yorn, the Stone Roses, Ra Ra Ra, and the Stones when one of my perennial favorites came on – the Blackjacks. The Blackjacks were a great Boston band in the early 80's that I loved in the Del Fuego's, Mission of Burma, Till Tuesday era. The nice stewardess felt compelled to ask if she could listen to the song right as Johnny Angel was doing the Blackjack Manifesto, who for those of you who don't know, uses a chorus of "Motherf&$8r's". I panicked, but figured best to let her listen rather than appear rude, and hope for the best. All was fine as she clearly didn't know what a "mother%7&$3r" was, until she asked. "What is Mother&6y843^$?" I told her it was a song about my X-wife and put the headphones back on.
- The boat trip – 3 days on a "luxury" cruise line through the 3-gorges with PhD's from the planet who spend time thinking about trusted computing as researchers. This needs much more detail, but know that A: it was right out of Apocalypse Now, and B: research is fascinating. Being the only non-Dr. on the boat was intimidating, until I let them all know I was the only actual smart one. Things seemed to get better from there. Yikes. My best line of week – when listening to pointless debate regarding Grid vs. Cloud definitions, was tremendously in the moment, or so I thought. "A cloud can be comprised of a grid, and a grid can be comprised of clouds", to which there was much rejoicing. I still don't know why anyone cares.
- Ten years ago there were 1 million cars in China, all Buicks. Now there are 1 Billion cars in China, mostly Buicks. There are no new roads, apparently no tests required to operate a car, no education as to how one should operate a car, and very limited common sense that I can see. It would be as if you woke up in the middle of Montana one day and there were cars everywhere, as far as the eye could see. Each car would be going in and out of other cars, horses, cows, bikes, buses, and pedestrians. Cars would drive on the sidewalk to garner an 11 inch advantage for 4 seconds, if necessary, though there is no where that car could go. And the Chinese are very, very happy to use their horns, to the exact same overall effect as a NY cab driver.
I'm in Germany, more to follow. Bitte.
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